


Alcohol

by awgaskarth0805



Category: All Time Low (Band)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-14
Updated: 2020-01-14
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:54:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22256785
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/awgaskarth0805/pseuds/awgaskarth0805
Summary: Alex trusts Jack with a big secret that he's never shared with anyone else.
Kudos: 7





	Alcohol

**Author's Note:**

> This is set in their freshman year of high school. This story is something that happened to me, but through them.

“Thanks for dinner, Mrs. Barakat, it was really good,” Alex said with a smile as he put his plate into the sink.  
“You’re more than welcome, Alex. Having you over is always a treat. You boys have fun tonight!” Mrs. Barakat replied.  
“Thanks, mom, we’re going up to my room now,” Jack said, handing his plate to his mom before leading Alex up to his bedroom.  
“Want to play the Wii? I just got the new Mario Kart game!” Jack asked as they walked upstairs.  
“Sure! I’ve been wanting to play that forever!” Alex exclaimed, following Jack into his room. Alex and Jack had been friends for about a year, and Alex was very grateful for their friendship.   
Jack had introduced him to what were now his favorite bands and TV shows and was generally just a great friend to Alex. As someone who had bad luck with friends in the past, Alex felt very lucky to have a true friend in Jack.  
“Here, you can even have the steering wheel thing to put over your remote, it makes it a little easier,” Jack said, handing Alex the controller with the wheel. Jack turned on the Wii, then sat on his bed with Alex as the opening credits to the game appeared on the screen.   
Once they picked their characters, they started a set of four races. By the end of it, Alex had gotten second place overall, and Jack had gotten fifth.  
“I so kicked your ass!” Alex exclaimed as a smug smile took over his face.  
“Shut the fuck up, you didn’t even win by that much,” Jack replied defensively.  
“What a sore loser,” Alex said, starting to laugh some.  
“Now you’re just bragging. Hey, because you’re being so obnoxious, you have to try something,” Jack said, getting up.  
“Shouldn’t I be making you do something of my choosing since I won?” Alex asked.  
“Well, technically yes, but this is so worth it, I promise. Look what I snuck out of the basement fridge before you came over!” Jack exclaimed, pulling out four cans of beer and a half-drunk bottle of wine from the mini fridge he had in his bedroom.   
Seeing these things made Alex tense up and made anxiety surge through his body.  
“Oh, um, I think I’m okay,” Alex replied, sounding a bit nervous.  
“No dude, this stuff will make tonight even more fun! I got the best tasting beer that my dad had down there, and I think this wine is sweet, which is good, because it can be bitter and gross sometimes. Have you ever tried either of these before?” Jack asked, putting everything on his bed next to Alex.   
The strong smell of alcohol coming from the wine made Alex gag a bit as he moved to the other side of the bed.  
“No, I’ve never, um, had any of that,” Alex replied.  
“Well, now is the perfect time to try it, then! I don’t think either of my parents are going to come in here for the rest of the night, so we can get a little drunk, and we won’t get caught,” Jack explained.   
“I think I’ll pass, man,” Alex said, sounding nervous.  
“What? Rian drank with me last time he slept over; you have to try it! Don’t worry, we won’t get busted,” Jack assured.  
“I’m not worried about that, I just don’t want to drink,” Alex stated.  
“Why not? I bet you’ll like it!” Jack tried.  
“Jack, I don’t want any of that, stop nagging me!” Alex exclaimed, turning away from his best friend. Alex started to take deep breaths, and Jack finally realized that he’d crossed a line. He put the beer and wine on his desk, then sat back down on his bed.  
“Alex, are you okay? Jack cautiously asked his friend. Alex slowly turned back around, an anxious look on his face and small tears starting to form in his eyes.  
“Woah, you look super freaked out, what’s wrong, man?” Jack continued, feeling worried about his friend. Alex took a deep breath before speaking.  
“When I was twelve, I promised myself that I would never drink alcohol because of my dad, because he’s an alcoholic,” Alex replied, sounding as anxious as he looked. Jack was taken aback; he never would’ve pinned Alex’s dad as someone with a drinking problem.  
“Really? I’ve never seen alcohol in your house when I’ve been there,” Jack replied.  
“That’s because he doesn’t drink anymore. When I was thirteen, I asked him to quit as a Christmas present. He cut back some, but still drank way too much. Right after I turned fourteen, he actually quit, so he’s been sober for a little over a year now,” Alex explained. Jack stayed silent for a second, taking in everything that he’d just been told.  
“If this is too personal, or you don’t feel comfortable talking about this, you absolutely don’t have to, but did he do things when you were younger because of it?” Jack asked, genuinely curious.  
“I think I’m just going to tell you everything, Jack. I haven’t ever talked about this with anyone outside of my family, because I’ve always been afraid to. I want to stop letting this have so much control over me, so I’m going to say everything, even though it’s hard to talk about. I’ll do my best,” Alex replied.  
“No problem, take as much time as you need. I’m here for you, man,” Jack replied, patting Alex on the back.  
“So, I didn’t really know what alcohol was until I was in sixth grade, which is also when I learned what alcoholism is. Up until that point, I just knew that my dad could be mean when he had a can in his hand. My mom used to work late, so my dad would be in charge, but I was really in charge of myself because he’d be too drunk to parent, which I didn’t realize until I was older.   
I used to not understand why my parents would get into fights so often, but now I know it was because he’d be hammered and start them. Towards the end of grade school, my friends would all come over, and say shit like ‘you enjoying that beer, Mr. Gaskarth?’ and it was meant to insult him, and always made me feel like shit. It also made me realize that something was off with my dad.   
I started picking up on the correlation between the amount he’d have to drink and his temper, and that’s how I learned what being drunk meant. I used to think that he could just quit, that my mom and I were enough of a reason to, because he’d be really mean to us. In sixth grade, I started to resent him and ignore him, since he drank daily, and any conversation would just end in an argument. This lasted until he finally quit drinking last year,” Alex explained, his voice shaky. He felt a lot of anxiety in his body, and this made tears start to spill from his eyes.  
“Hey, don’t cry, dude, it’s okay. I’m sorry you had to go through all of that, I honestly had no idea, and never would’ve been able to figure that out about him for myself without you saying this. If you don’t mind me asking, why haven’t you told me about this before?” Jack asked in a sympathetic voice.  
“I was too afraid to. Whenever I’ve considered telling someone about this, I always see it ending in the person I tell judging me or my family. I’ve always felt stupid about how much anxiety this situation gives me, but so many people see an addict, and immediately think that they’re one of the worst people in the world, and that’s not true. By not sharing this and making it such a big secret, I’ve made a bigger deal about this to myself than it probably really is, which isn’t smart. I never wanted a ‘perfect family’, I just wanted my situation to be normal. I’ve literally never told anyone about this, except for you now,” Alex replied.  
“Well, I won’t judge you or your family, dude, I don’t have a reason to. It’s great that you tried to help him when you were thirteen, and that he’s been sober for over a year already! Seriously, that’s so awesome! I think your dad is a great guy and knowing that he’s been able to overcome this and improve himself for you, your mom, and himself makes him even cooler! I’m sorry that your old friends were such dicks about this, that’s seriously fucked up. I hope you know that I’d never do anything like that, you’re my best friend, I want to help you navigate this, not make it harder for you,” Jack said, looking Alex in the eyes.  
“Thank you, Jack, I really apricate you saying that. I’m glad I told you about this. Something else I’ve never shared, is my fear about him relapsing. Sometimes, dad gets upset about work or something, and I’m always worried about him relapsing from it. I think he knows that his life is so much better now that he doesn’t drink, but I’m still afraid that something will work him up enough to make him turn to alcohol again, or at least consider it,” Alex admitted, his voice getting shaky again.  
“Well, I hope for you and your family that he doesn’t, but if he does, I’ll be there for you, I promise. I won’t let you go through any of this alone. You can sleep over here as much as you want or need, and I’ll do whatever I can to help you cope. I hope none of that actually has to happen, but I’ll do everything I can to make it easier for you, I promise,” Jack said, sincerity in his voice. Alex wiped away a few stray tears as a smile appeared on his face.  
“Thanks, Jack, you’re the best. I know that this was all kind of a lot, so thank you,” Alex stated.  
“You’re welcome, man, I’m glad that you told me and trusted me with all of this. I won’t tell anyone about this, so don’t worry about that. I’m sorry I kept pushing you to drink earlier, if I’d known all of this, there’s no way that I would’ve kept going like I did,” Jack replied.  
“It’s okay, you didn’t know, that’s not your fault. Sorry that I’m going to be kind of boring, as far as drinking goes,” Alex said back.  
“I totally understand, I’m sure that if I had to go through everything that you did, I wouldn’t want to partake, either. Trauma is hard, no one can really make you heal faster from it, but people can certainly help the process, and now that I now all of this, I can try to do that for you,” Jack said.  
“Thank you for saying all of that, man. I’ve always been so scared of telling people about this, so thank you for helping me see that it’s really not a gig deal. You’re a really great friend,” Alex said, making them smile.  
“I try to be. Let me put this shit away, I know you don’t want to see or smell it. Hey, if you ever want to try out drinking, I’d be more than happy to be there with you and help you with it and try to make it less anxiety provoking for you, but I’ll never force you to drink,” Jack said, putting the alcohol back into his mini fridge.  
“I appreciate that. If I ever feel ready to try it, I’ll definitely try it with you. Thank you for listening to me and for making me feel better. I’m glad that we’re friends,” Alex said.   
“I’m glad we’re friends, too. I’ll always be here for you, man. well, except for right now, because it’s time for me to kick your ass in Mario Kart!” Jack exclaimed, starting a new race.  
“Oh, it’s on! You know I’m going to win!” Alex said back. Even though being fully transparent was scary, Alex was glad that he told Alex about his past, and that it had gone over well.   
Jack was glad that Alex trusted him so much, and they were both glad that they had such a solid, strong friendship, and that they could always count on each other, no matter what.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, this was an original idea of mine based on my younger years. Everything that Alex talked about in this story happened to me when I was a kid/middle schooler. The only thing that is slightly different is that my dad is six years sober, not one like I wrote in this story (in my freshman year of high school, he'd only been sober for a year, so I made the timeline of this story identical to my own). I wrote a story similar to this for a different fandom four years ago, and I thought I'd make a new version to tell you guys, because this is a big part of my life, and I wanted to share it. I'm currently studying to get my PhD in psychology to be a family therapist and work with addicts, and the reasons for that are in this story. I know this is a little heavier than what I normally share, but I thought maybe people who read my work would be in a similar situation, and find some comfort in this story, and I hope that's the case. Thank you for giving me a space where I feel comfortable sharing this part of my life, you guys are seriously the best, and I love writing and sharing stories with you, heavier ones and what I normally post. Please send in requests if you have them, thank you for reading, and just know that I'm always here for you guys if you need it. Lots of love, Liv.


End file.
